Critical...

Critical....3-13-25

My husband and I were talking before work this morning, as we always do, and it occurred to me that sometimes I can be rather critical. Now, I don't mean critical of others as much as I mean critical of myself. I am harder on myself than anyone could ever be. I see what I think I should have done right away, and I'm immediately remorseful, embarrassed, ashamed, or even hesitant to see someone again because I felt I shouldn't have behaved in a certain way. What is wrong about all this is that most of the time I didn't do or say anything that was out of the ordinary, mean spirited, or ugly. I will talk to my husband or someone else in the situation later, and they don't understand why I'm even making a big deal or worried about the issue. I said "sometimes". My sister who passed away recently had a saying, "Be Pretty!". I think of that when I am trying to tame the mouth God gave me and the devil wants to use. I think of her and smile.

On the other hand, some people are very critical of others. They don't see anything they are doing wrong, but see the wrong in others' lives. I know this person who has been critical of me for almost 43 years. Everything I've ever done, said, or expressed has been in the "wrong". I am used to it and I am used to the critical nature. I don't talk to her often because I know who I am and I know who God made me. But, I asked her one time if there was anything in a particular situation that she needed to apologize for. Her response, "I haven't done anything wrong. I don't need to apologize for anything I've done." Wow!. There is that Wow moment. That moment you just simply stop, shut your mouth, and say, "You are God and I am not!" to the One who leads.

Why do I bring this up? I opened my mouth last night. I judged. I was critical of someone's behavior. Matthew 7:1-2, "Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again". My point here is that grace is freely given to us. That grace should be freely extended to others. The Holy Spirit inside of me directs me when I sin. It leads me and sometimes I fail. I love the way I know immediately when I need to ask for forgiveness, and I know immediately when I need to stop, say a prayer for assistance, a prayer for His guidance, and just "Be Still". You see, in those moments I know I am His. If I wasn't, I wouldn't be having this conversation. God wouldn't have dealt with me. I wouldn't understand and need to ask for forgiveness. These moments reaffirm my understanding that I am allowing Him to guide me.

There was a time in my life that I wouldn't have sought guidance. There was a time in my life when I would have been like that person I know and felt I wasn't in the wrong. But the Lord opened my eyes to see that each person is not an island. Being critical of others without seeing what is in our own lives leads to a "haughty spirit" and prideful nature. James 3:2-3 states, "We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check. When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal." In this verse, James is warning those who struggle that like a horse can be controlled with a bit in it's mouth, so can our tongue be tamed and control our bodies. Do I believe there is anyone on earth that is perfect? I absolutely do not! But, I believe we can strive for the Heavenly perfection of our Father. We can strive for the Holy Spirit's guidance that assists us in grace and mercy. We can love unconditionally. We can lift others up.